‘Shiva Baby’ and Nailing Bisexuality
SPOILER WARNING for Shiva Baby (2021).
“No funny business with Maya.”
It’s the line in Shiva Baby that set many bisexuals to ‘cringe’ from the accuracy, you know, turning sexuality into a loud toy not to be played with in public. That line, though, is the first of many shoe drops that set off this fun, messy, anxiety-inducing story from Emma Seligman and co. The story already starts colorfully with Danielle earning her paycheck as a sugar baby. Now, from her mom’s mandate, we learn she’s queer — more specifically bi.
We quickly discover a lot about who Danielle is in relation to everyone at the shiva: a daughter studying gender business, an ex-girlfriend, a sugar baby, a homewrecker, etc. While any of those labels would be fun to explore, I want to focus on her bisexuality and how the film is one of the best and concurrently one of the most fun and stressful bisexual stories I’ve seen.
Often with bisexual characters, we see them do this transition from liking one gender to another. They present as one orientation, then their sexuality gets more room to breathe, and the story reveals them to be bi (or pan in some cases like David in Schitt’s Creek). What I like about how sexuality is portrayed in Shiva Baby is the decision to show the character going back and forth between two genders. I feel it’s a more realistic portrayal of sexual fluidity. Whereas the transition I recently mentioned may echo antiquated beliefs that one is either “going through a phase” or has “turned gay.”
Danielle is caught between her ex-girlfriend and her sugar daddy at a shiva of all places. There’s a scene where Danielle and her ex, Maya, are creating the most sexual tension one could muster while cleaning baby vomit. This interaction sets off some double takes and concerned looks from the respective mothers of the two. It’s brief, but it adds to the ever-building thrill overtaking this shiva. Danielle also makes her way to the bathroom and decides to sext Sugar Daddy Max, adding another dose of stress to the mix. I think it’s excellent writing for a bisexual story to have either lane of attraction be dangerous to explore.
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Danielle builds on these moments, upping the tension of the whole affair. She follows up sexting Max by following him up to the bathroom, attempting to do the very thing she said she wouldn’t: blow the guy in the bathroom. It’s a very tense scene given the circumstances just steps below them. The same amount of intensity is lent to the make-out scene outside of the shiva with Maya. Danielle again takes charge here and kisses Maya in sight, but miraculously out of sight, of the grieving party. Shiva Baby kept things equal with both members of her gaze. Equal in attraction and equal in risky hijinks.
I believe this film does have an easier time telling its story because Danielle’s a woman. There’s more freedom given to women exploring their sexuality while still maintaining the gray area. I’d one day love to see more of these types of stories written with a guy in the lead position, challenging that double standard. This aside isn’t to take away any shine from this effort. I just know the representation of bi men has hill yet to climb. For now, Oberyn Martell will continue to stand as my favorite bi dude in TV/film.
There’s not a lot of bisexual stories out here, and even fewer good ones. Shiva Baby is a good one. While the movie deserves praise for many things — telling a story in real-time, taking an aspect of Jewish culture and making it horror, etc. — but its ability to represent bisexuality accurately was what took the top spot for me. It’s not just making a character queer for the sake of it, and it’s not trying way too hard to shock you with someone’s fluidity either. It takes a character, and in 77 minutes, shows us her bisexual experience, tying to it real stakes. Her sexuality isn’t a feature in the story; it is the story. Through the lens of this movie as a Jewish horror flick, bisexuality in the killer here and what a slasher it is.
digital. visual. emotional.
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